Radical Day to Day
Yesterday, I failed to be a radical woman for much of the day, but succeeded at the end. How?
It started when I didn't pay attention to my children for an hour or so. They were there, I was there, but I didn't walk around and monitor them. (That's important, because there are 4 under the age of 6.)
While I was putting a bunch of kids clothes on e-bay, my 4 year-old decided to cut her hair. She managed NOT to give herself a bald spot in the process. So all-in-all, I suppose it could have been much worse. Still, I flipped out. Then, I got depressed because I flipped out.
I hope I'm not the only one who gets mad at herself for losing her temper.
We were on the way to my inlaws house. I took the kids by myself and left my miserably sick-with-the-flu husband at home. The visit went well. We saw my kids' grandparents, aunt, 3 cousins, great-aunt, great-uncle, and 2nd cousin. We took the kids on a half mile walk to the local playground (the kids rode in a wagon).
When we got back, my niece asked me if we were going on to visit another relative with them. All I said was, "No", but inside, the dialogue continued....
"No. We never visit that house. In the 3 years since they moved in, we've never seen them because they won't see us. They've avoided us since your cousin was born. Can't you see how unfair it is that everyone invites us over and then visits them? No one says anything. No one confronts them. They enable it, and you probably think that we don't like them instead of it being the other way around."
I drove home with my kids as the rest of the family went on to visit this other relative. We've never confronted this relative, because my husband wants to leave the door open to them. He wants to reconcile the relationship, and we pray that one day it will happen.
It hurt. I felt like I'd been slammed from my happy, Christian world to the "real" world. A "real" world of pain, suffering, and damaged relationships. A world where no one wins and everyone loses.
When I got home, one of our priests was at the house with his wife to bring my husband communion. He'd missed church and communion that morning. I told him about the situation.
"That's not the real world," he said. "This is the real world." The world of love, communion, and friendship is the real world. The world of pain and suffering is the fake world.
My heart lightened immediately.
People who live in the "real" world know a lot about pain and suffering, and it's a part of them. I live in Christ's world. It's a world where beauty exists in every moment, Christ carries my heavy burdens, and I can be open to receive love from God and man without fear of hurt or sorrow. I'll experience my share of hurt on earth, but there's no need for me to fear it.
Last weekend, a prophetic priest named Father Jacob Danner taught the School of the Holy Spirit at my church. He gave a testimony about his wife's pain and suffering. She has migraine headaches non-stop. Her pain never ends. Even morphine won't take the edge off. Why won't God heal her? No one knows except for God, but when we plow through the pain, as we "walk THROUGH the valley of the shadow of death" we gain.
Archbishop Randolph Adler, the patriarch of the Charismatic Episcopal Church lost his daughter and her unborn child in a car accident 2 years ago and says it was the best thing that ever happened to him. Through the pain he saw the love, compassion, and grace of God in a way he'd never seen it before.
As women of Radical Femininity, we walk through the pain of life - we don't run away or try to avoid it - and God blesses us with strength, peace, and knowledge of Him. We strive to live in His presence moment by moment and bring heaven to earth.
Radical Femininity brings Christ to earth as we live our lives in His overcoming strength and power. We submit to His authority (and our husband's, pastor's, and those in authority over us) and we ACTIVELY forgive, love, and share. Radical Feminity is about DOING and not about passively being tromped on.
With my relatives, I choose to actively forgive, actively love, and actively experience peace. I can even actively wait for their change of heart. Actively wait? Absolutely! Because I will be praying and expecting reconciliation.
It started when I didn't pay attention to my children for an hour or so. They were there, I was there, but I didn't walk around and monitor them. (That's important, because there are 4 under the age of 6.)
While I was putting a bunch of kids clothes on e-bay, my 4 year-old decided to cut her hair. She managed NOT to give herself a bald spot in the process. So all-in-all, I suppose it could have been much worse. Still, I flipped out. Then, I got depressed because I flipped out.
I hope I'm not the only one who gets mad at herself for losing her temper.
We were on the way to my inlaws house. I took the kids by myself and left my miserably sick-with-the-flu husband at home. The visit went well. We saw my kids' grandparents, aunt, 3 cousins, great-aunt, great-uncle, and 2nd cousin. We took the kids on a half mile walk to the local playground (the kids rode in a wagon).
When we got back, my niece asked me if we were going on to visit another relative with them. All I said was, "No", but inside, the dialogue continued....
"No. We never visit that house. In the 3 years since they moved in, we've never seen them because they won't see us. They've avoided us since your cousin was born. Can't you see how unfair it is that everyone invites us over and then visits them? No one says anything. No one confronts them. They enable it, and you probably think that we don't like them instead of it being the other way around."
I drove home with my kids as the rest of the family went on to visit this other relative. We've never confronted this relative, because my husband wants to leave the door open to them. He wants to reconcile the relationship, and we pray that one day it will happen.
It hurt. I felt like I'd been slammed from my happy, Christian world to the "real" world. A "real" world of pain, suffering, and damaged relationships. A world where no one wins and everyone loses.
When I got home, one of our priests was at the house with his wife to bring my husband communion. He'd missed church and communion that morning. I told him about the situation.
"That's not the real world," he said. "This is the real world." The world of love, communion, and friendship is the real world. The world of pain and suffering is the fake world.
My heart lightened immediately.
People who live in the "real" world know a lot about pain and suffering, and it's a part of them. I live in Christ's world. It's a world where beauty exists in every moment, Christ carries my heavy burdens, and I can be open to receive love from God and man without fear of hurt or sorrow. I'll experience my share of hurt on earth, but there's no need for me to fear it.
Last weekend, a prophetic priest named Father Jacob Danner taught the School of the Holy Spirit at my church. He gave a testimony about his wife's pain and suffering. She has migraine headaches non-stop. Her pain never ends. Even morphine won't take the edge off. Why won't God heal her? No one knows except for God, but when we plow through the pain, as we "walk THROUGH the valley of the shadow of death" we gain.
Archbishop Randolph Adler, the patriarch of the Charismatic Episcopal Church lost his daughter and her unborn child in a car accident 2 years ago and says it was the best thing that ever happened to him. Through the pain he saw the love, compassion, and grace of God in a way he'd never seen it before.
As women of Radical Femininity, we walk through the pain of life - we don't run away or try to avoid it - and God blesses us with strength, peace, and knowledge of Him. We strive to live in His presence moment by moment and bring heaven to earth.
Radical Femininity brings Christ to earth as we live our lives in His overcoming strength and power. We submit to His authority (and our husband's, pastor's, and those in authority over us) and we ACTIVELY forgive, love, and share. Radical Feminity is about DOING and not about passively being tromped on.
With my relatives, I choose to actively forgive, actively love, and actively experience peace. I can even actively wait for their change of heart. Actively wait? Absolutely! Because I will be praying and expecting reconciliation.
posted by Terri | 2:00 PM
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